溫度日記
Hearty Journal

Day 1.
It's going smoothly so far. Although my nightmares are getting worse. I couldn't sleep last night. I believe it was my fault after all I was on my phone till midnight. And I knew this will affect me but still FOMO (fear of missing out). So after I finally fall asleep which was around 4 am I had a nightmare. It felt like 2 separate dreams joined together. First one as much as I remember. I was in a massive house. I'm not sure who was with me in that dream but I was a little girl and the ground floor of the house was haunted by evil spirit. For my luck we had a massive hole in the floor so we could see living room to the haunted floor. Mainly because I was a kid I liked to sit around the whole and watch what is happening in that room. Not sure why. It also felt like I was all alone I the house like my parents were there but unavailable. Weird. The other dream kind of started in that house (that's how it felt) although I was already an adult and I was living by myself. My mum came over to help me prepare my birthday party (which was late like few weeks I remember I felt very strange because it was really late late bp) next things I was talking through the phone with a stranger who was living in the same country as me. Then we stopped talking and said we will talk later as I had to go and pick up something from my sister house (she lived just in the next building) the house she was living in had a few flats and looked like a slum. The people over there were either addicts or drunkard and a lot homeless ppl were coming over to drink and sleep there. Although outside of her flat was awful my sisters flat itself was cozy. It was looked after and nice decorated the things were also modern style she had a living room joined with bedroom and separated kitchen. I was worried at first how will I get in but her landlord let me in. Her flat was a little bit dirty. Just few things on the floor some litter etc. She had a yellow corner sofa it was gorgeous. Her landlord came through and he didn't even notice I'm not her so I I introduced myself but he didn't care and ignored it. He came over to fix my sister key ring. It wasn't actually broken but somehow loose so the key could fall off and get lost anytime. Then my sister come back from work I belive and she helped me find what I needed. We walked out as we were going back to mine to help my mum finish cleaning and getting my house ready for the party. And she was talking with some boy (still being in relationship with M and being married) they didn't want anyone to find out so they were living each others notes and got their friend to deliver the notes to them. My sister had something black on her nose. She took it off and we had to go up the giant hill. It was so steep it was really hard to climb and there were loads of tiny crabs climbing and stinging our feet. On the end of the steep there was a horse sculpture and we had to climb on that too in order to get off the hill. While I was trying to get on the horse my phone start ringing. It was the guy I spoke earlier on the phone (I can't remember his name but I ramber he was a foreign too handsome one) I was trying to talk to him but people gathered around me and my sister (my sister friends) and were so laud plus were asking about the party so it was hard to talk and he was getting annoyed. We walked to a kind of American diner for pancakes but I knew its getting late and I wanted to go back to my house I felt sorry for my mum that she has to do everything by herself. My sister was sitting there with her friend (that boy from notes) so I told her I'm going back to my house. I was walking g through the street and talking to that guy and he asked me why I didn't invite him and he would be happy to come over. I was a bit sceptical but then thought why not I don't want to loose opportunity to love someone just because of my fear and insecurity. All of sudden I was passing a guy and he looked like that boy. I was shocked he start talking to me and I smiled and said how did you got here so fast? That's crazy! I was happy to see him. And then he said. - I don't think you know who I am. In fact I'm sure you don't recognise me. I'm W..xx from Birmingham and we spoke on the phone few days ago. You told me to not contact you ever again. And all of sudden the boy changed to old and fat man with black hair and vold patches. I said to him - I told you to not contact me ever again so you decided to stalk me and find me?! I'm calling police! - he was like go ahead call police I wonder what you gonna tell them - so I picked my phone up and pretend that I was calling. He got very mad and start to walk away. I was trying to go on WhatsApp and record him as I felt that he will be back. I was going through the contracts and I realised I have no one to call that I'm in danger. I couldn't find recording application and he was already back pissed off. He grabbed me and I was trying to fight but I was so powerless. I was trying to hit him but it felt like my heands were like feathers saddle with cement weights. It felt like I can't move my hands and when I finally touched him he just dodge with such lightness it was unbelievable. I was trying to push my thumb in his eyes so he would loosen the grip but I couldn't. He pushed his finger in my belly button and was very surprised I didn't react. It hurt and was very uncomfortable but I knew I have to focus on my thumbs otherwise I'm gonna loose. I managed to push and he loosen the grip. I started to run away and call police in the same time. He was chasing me and when he got me he was trying to take off my pants and see my pussy. I was so annoyed. That's the last things I can remember. I don't know what happened after that. So yeah have a good day folks. ❤️

溫度日記 Hearty Journal